Barrell full of Mum-Keys

For better or worse, there is no city in the world that has a celebration like Philly on New Years day. Mardis Gras, Carnival, etc have nothing on the Mummers day parade. Where else will you get a bunch of cross dressing  union workers in feathers, gold boots, and sequence? Hopefully Philly is the only place like this.

A few of my friends, who are mostly members of the Brutaltron Bicycle Club, and I  are part of a New Years Brigade called the Mollywoppers that “perfoms” on New Years Day. This is our second year doing this. We have a bunch of fun and really just make absolute idiots of ourselves for the sake of having a good time on new years.

Most of the year our meetings are a bunch of us watching Monday Night Football at the bar while talking about bikes. Our Mummer brethren on the other hand are spending thousands of dollars and every spare moment planning, practicing, and primping for the big day. We take this about as “unserious” as we can….that is the fun in it. If we wanted to be serious, we would be able to win and maybe move up from second to last the last two years in a row.

Second to last…you know what that means? TWO GROUPS ARE WORSE THAN US! I have no idea how you can be worse than us, but we are not practicing correctly, or they are having too good of a time.

This year our theam was a barell full of Mumkeys. You can check the outfit below.

Most of the planning that went into this was ordering the stuff that we needed and making sure the beer truck was full.

Somehow we got a bunch of barhounds and the best partiers in Philadelphia to wake up before dawn on New Years day and head out to our meeting spot where we applied gold paint to our shoes, stated the party right, and just had some general bs talk.

We were pros and had a group picture taken this year!

There was some rain the night before and in the early morning, so the start was moved back a bit. We spent this time on Broad street talking to our friends who were dressed as dancing foodstuffs.

Check out this guys Gossip Column!

The walk down broad is a good time. People love the mummers, and there is a sort of Mummer martial law that is in effect at the parade. More or less anything goes. We kept it mostly clean and made sure that kiddies along the route hand some of out blow up monkeys and bananas.

Our perofmance at city hall was fantastic. It was more or less a “mosh pit” with no music. They said that we did not make it on tv, but really…who cares? We were as awesome as we wanted to be.

As the crew of monkies we made our way to some of the seeder places in the city and of course had as much fun as was allowed. We ended up at the mollywoppers family gathering at club fluid where they drank more beer and I tried to nap.

Two Green eyed monsters. Good ole Oliver

Somwhere along the way we lost a few of our crew, but we still made our way to 2street for the real parade and party. It takes forever to walk down 2street but the party down there is worth the wait. You just have to experience it. I can not even imagine to describe what goes on down there and how insane it is.

The whole barrel of monkess were in bed and resting up by 10. That is more rare than 30 monkeys walking down broad street.

There are more pictures here. and you can see some more here from my boy MJ


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